Its time to stop falling for the BS

I just did a blog about stupid guys who don’t know how to approach a woman. But I can’t be unfair and put it all on the guys because it’s us too! My friends Roger and Dakari of course made a good point in saying we fall for it all the time! (p.s this blog can applied to guys too!)

Well it’s time to stop! It’s time to stop chasing, its time to stop letting guys treat us badly, it’s time to stop crawling back only to be left again, its time to stop being so trusting, its time to stop SETTLING. This blog is out of experience and frustration for the girls I see continuing to get their heart stomped on. I can only put so much on the guys, but ladies, its time to realize it’s YOU too. You determine how a guy treats you and here’s where I explain why:

Have you ever babysat? Or do you have a son or daughter? So what happens when you let them get away with something? THEY DO IT AGAIN! And they’ll keep doing it until you tell them to stop. Sometimes telling them isn’t enough, sometimes you have to give them a timeout, or take something away. So…

1. Don’t let a guy even get away with treating you bad. Don’t let him get away with talking to you rudely, standing you up, disrespecting you, and God forbid HITTING you. I don’t care how fine he is, how many other girls want him, how nice he dresses, how athletic he is…

I T’ S      N O T       W O R T H     I T

By letting a guy get away with disrespecting you, you’re only perpetuating it and telling him it is okay. Find your voice and speak up! If he leaves, let him leave. Trust me, he probably wasn’t worth it anyway. As a matter of fact, once he realizes how dumb and stupid he was to disrespect you, he’ll probably call and apologize but don’t you DARE call him first.

2. Stop being so trusting. (this was a HUGE one for me). I think its okay to have your guard up, you know why? People lie. Some people lie very very well. So go with your first instincts ALL THE TIME. Don’t fall for the lines you hear all the time, make him show you. “I’m different” “This isn’t about sex” “There’s no one else”…. Don’t be so quick to take his world for it! Make him prove it to you!

3. Stop playing games. We don’t like games, and neither do guys. Either you guys are attracted to each other or you’re not attracted to each other. There’s nothing strategic to it, just keep it moving! The minute a guy thinks you’re trying to play them, you’ll never hear from them again. Avoid the drama and just be real. Make sure both of you are on the same plane. If he just wants to have fun and has made it clear he doesn’t want a relationship, make sure you understand that. Don’t be the idiot trying to play hard to get when he does not want to try hard to get you!

4. Learn to be happy by yourself. Never think a guy can make you happy, and never let him tell you he can make you happy.This is one that I can really relate to! It’s so important to be happy and secure without a man. I think when you’re confident in yourself you won’t be so quick to fall for the bs!! I also believe that confidence, positivity, and independence will eventually bring the best man for you. But negativity, self-loathing, and desperation will only bring you negative, disrespecting, and rude men.

5. Take it slow, be his friend first. God there is nothing worse than RUSHING into a relationship BELIEVE ME. ugh. I can’t tell you how bad this will turn out. You go out with a person and then you find out they are NOT the person you thought they were. Get to know the person first. Don’t waste your time! This may or may not take awhile, but they say you don’t see a person’s real self until you’ve known him for 6 months. I’ll get back to you with the source on that one. But I fully believe that!

6. S t o p    S e t t l in g. Never lower your standards only to get a boyfriend. You’ll only end up dis-satisfied and hurt in the end. NEVER let anyone tell you your standards are too high. Only YOU know exact what you need in a man. I believe if you stick to that, ultimately you’ll have a successful relationship. But being desperate, needy, and hasty leads to NOTHING but a difficult relationship. It’s hard to be patient when nothing seems to be working (I know) but in the end, it’ll be worth it.

The Bottom line: This post was more towards women but it can be applied to men too. I just know through experience that we’re blind slighted by emotions all the time. If we would think clearly and find happiness by ourselves, we could save ourselves a lot of heartache. And a lot of retarded facebook statuses… lol.

-Britt

P.S. check out my friends’ blogs! on the right hand column! why does column have an N at the end. That’s so dumb.